Friday, August 31, 2012

Dare to dare

If there were ever a time to dare,
to make a difference,
to embark on something worth doing,
it is now.
Not for any grand cause, necessarily-
but for something that tugs at your heart,
something that's your aspiration,
something that's your dream.

You owe it to yourself
to make your days here count.
Have fun.
Dig deep.
Dream big.
From a Macintosh computer ad, 1991

That's actually all that's need to be said - Make your days count! Now is the right time to try something new that you have always been interested in. It's time to dare.
So the advice of the day is: dare to dare!

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Dare to confess your failure and move on

As August comes to the end I need to confess that I couldn't keep my promise. I don't want to find excuses for myself, they are not important. The important part is that I decided to go on, not to give up on myself. Yes, I don't want to hurt my knee while keeping with the physical challange, that's why I plan to start going in for swimming. Tha shouldn't have any pressure on the knee and I will get my exercises done.
Sometimes you have to give up some things but that doesn't mean that you should give up the whole dream itself. I dream to become a fit person who enjoys physical activities and I will keep pursuing this dream. And I began to start falling in love with running, so hopefully the knee will start feeling better and I can go back to jogging. We'll see how it works out. I don't want to give a public promice about that at the moment:)

So the advice of the day is: dare to move on!

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Dare to be brave

I was looking through my diary today and found this little poem by Samanthe Reynolds. I found it very useful to me and wrote it down. And now I want to share it with you. It is called: Be Brave Tonight

Courage is not a genetic hand-me-down
or a choice you can rely on
in the moment

it is a muscle

if you do not use it
it will shrink
you will go to be brave one day
and find you are floppy
and unsure.

so try on
your convictions
start with your own echo
the words that play in your head
quicksand words
telling you things like

stand up to yourself
stare down the doubt

in the pitch-black privacy 
of your darkest thought
be gutsy
remember that a sadow 
carries no weight

rescue yourself
and you will grow
like a plant to sunlight
towards valor. 

So the advice of the day is: dare to be brave.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Dare to be confident in yourself

This is the continuation of yesterday's post. Remember how yesterday I was saying that I wasn't sure that I was good enough for my job? Well today it's completely different. I have got some tasks which prove that my manager is actually trusting me with much more than I myself think I am capable of. Well, I should put it a little differently - I know that I am capable to do a lot, but I am just scared to take such kind of responsibility. But isn't fear a good thing? It means that you are getting out of your comfort zone, and when you do that you evolve, you learn, you become better.
The thing is that I was brought up in an old-fashioned way, where I was taught that you should not interupt adults, that they know better - and therefore I was not taught to say my own opinion, I was kind of always relying on the adults. And I am also the youngest sister in my family, so I was always taken care of. I don't want you to think that I can not take care of mysef or make my own decisions. No, absolutely not. I have been living on my own since I was 21 years old (that's shen I went abroad for a year). But I was always afraid to speak up, I preferred to stay in the shadow. But my manager is teaching me a lot, she always asks for my opinion. I also learn from our architect that it is perfectly ok to have a negative opinion of something and to say, not try to be always nice to everyone. If you are being nice when you dn't feel that way - aren't you lying to youself and others then? So I am so greatful for my job and my colleagues who teach me so many valuable lessons, and one of them (which is also the advice of the day) is: dare to be confident in yourself!

Monday, August 27, 2012

Dare to not care what others think

This post is a small reminder to myself. I tend to overthink what others would think of me, of my actions and behaviour. Most of the times what others think about you doesn't really matter - because honestly a lot of people you see in the streets (when for example you go for a run and are a bit shy of other people) don't even think about you. Yes, of course they might have a quick thought in their mind just for a second or two, and then you run past them and they keep on going thinking about their own lives and ideas and plans for the day, etc.
Now when it comes to what close people (including co-workers) think about you - here I have a double-sided opinion. On the one hand it is important and you should pay attention to their opinions ... Wait.. Now that I think about how to put it into words I come to realize that I don't have a double-sided opinion, nope, I'm completely sure that what you think about yourself is always much more important.
The reason why I decided to write about it today is because we had a big department meeting today, after which I caught myself thinking that I was afraid my manager was not completely satisfied with me. So I was afraid of what she thought about me and my performance at work. But the reason for that fear is in what I think about myself, not what she thinks about me. I feel that I am not doing my job 100%, I know that I could use my time more efficiently and I am working on that every day. So it is my opinion here that matters, that makes me want to improve myself, not my manager's.
And the advice of the day is: dare to not care what others think.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Dare to enjoy yourself

A couple of days ago I watched a Woody Allen movie "Everyone says I love you". It was released in 1996 but this song of the Grandpa is still so up-to-date. Here are the lyrics.

You work and work for years and years, you're always on the goYou never take a minute off, too busy makin' doughSomeday you say, you'll have your fun, when you're a millionaireImagine all the fun you'll have in your old rockin' chair
Enjoy yourself, it's later than you thinkEnjoy yourself, while you're still in the pinkThe years go by, as quickly as a winkEnjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it's later than you think
You're gonna take that ocean trip, no matter come what mayYou've got your reservations made, but you just can't get awayNext year for sure, you'll see the world, you'll really get aroundBut how far can you travel when you're six feet underground?
Your heart of hearts, your dream of dreams, your ravishing brunetteShe's left you and she's now become somebody else's petLay down that gun, don't try my friend to reach the great beyondYou'll have more fun by reaching for a redhead or a blond
Enjoy yourself, it's later than you thinkEnjoy yourself, while you're still in the pinkThe years go by, as quickly as a winkEnjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it's later than you think
You never go to night clubs and you just don't care to danceYou don't have time for silly things like moonlight and romanceYou only think of dollar bills tied neatly in a stackBut when you kiss a dollar bill, it doesn't kiss you back
Enjoy yourself, it's later than you thinkEnjoy yourself, while you're still in the pinkThe years go by, as quickly as a winkEnjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it's later than you think
So the advice of the day is: dare to enjy yourself now. Enjoy your life now. Don't wait, otherwise all your life will be spent waiting. 

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Dare to be happy

Chris Guillebeau is one of the first people who got a seperate folder in my Inbox. I love his blog, and I love that he has travelled almost all (!!!) of the countires on our plane - only 7 are left, if I am not mistaken. And this week his newletter title got me bery intrigued. It said "How to be unhappy". I read it several times just to make sure that I read it right, that it really says happy, without the un. But ni, that was not a misread or misspell. He was really speaking about being unhappy, but in a very sarcastic way and all of the ways are so true, that exactly is how people (myself included) making themselves unhappy each day. I wanted to copy paste his article here, but don't think it is correct. So go ahead and read it here.
And the advice of the day is: dare to be happy.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Dare to believe

I have a found the new appartment in 1.5 days! Yay! That is the power of faith! Do you remember how I wrote that I was absolutely calm and confident about having to find and move in a new apartment by the end of the week. And we did. We signed the papers today, I will move in tomorrow.
And also today I listend to a song with the same name "Dare to believe" by Boyce Avenue and I absolutely love these words:
It's feeling like the time's run out
But the hour glass just flipped itself over again
The sun is slowly sinking down
But on the other side a new day waits to begin

So the advice of the day is: dare to believe.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Dare to doubt

I am in a big doubt - should I continue the jogging or stop and search for a different activity. The thing is that my knee hurts. It is not a permanent pain, but it hurts when I do sit-ups, for example, or after sitting with my legs crossed. That was actually the reason why I stopped doing workout with Jillian Michaels - I could feel that when I took 2 days off to go to my Mom's my knee was feeling much better. In Jillian's workout almost all of the exercise are done on foot - and there is jumping, and sitting up and down and what not. I thought that with running it should be easier. But this Tuesday (after I ran for 30 minutes the night before) I could feel the pain when I was walking down the stairs and it scared me a bit. I don't want to have problems with my knees in such a young age. And I began to love jogging but at the same time do not want to injure my body. And there is another reason for the doubt - and it is the rpomise. I also say that if you promise something, than you should keep your word or do your best to keep it. For example, I took my running shoes to the business trip as I had promised. But I also knew that there will be a swimming pool in the hotel, so I also took the swimming suit and decided to do least one or the other. And I went swimmimg. I didn't skip the workout,I just changed it a little bit. I will take a bit more time to think about my doubts and will get back to you in a day or two with my decision.
And meanwhile the advice of the day is: dare to doubt. It is when you doubt that you listen to yourself more carefully.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Dare to feel confident

I have only 4 days left to move out of this apartment and move into a new one - and I have no variants whatsoever at the moment. But I still feel very confident that I (well, we - my sister, her husband and me) will find exactly what we are looking for on time. I am not at all worried about that. And I know that it is when you are that confident, the necessary things happen to you / come into your life. Today it's going to be this very short post because I feel extremely tired after the 2-day business trip to Ufa (though I am extremely happy that I have the job whereI am not just sitting in the office, but also travelling). So the advice of the day is: dare to feel confident.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Dare to accept your anger

How do you react to your anger? How do you express your anger? And DO you usually express you anger?

Last weekend I went to visit my Mom and on the way back I asked a young couple to change sits. The girl didn't have anything against it, but the boy siad "No". I asked why and he said that there was no reason, he just didn't want to. That made me angry. I said that I wish that the people they come across with in their life would be as kind to them as they had been to me. After that I felt very guilty about get angry upon such a little problem. My tatoo on the shoulder keeps reminding me that I should love people through my actions - but sometimes the actions do not correspond to what's written on the shoulder. But in't it natural for a human being to get angry sometimes? it is one of the basic emotions, you cannot reject it. The only thing that I wish I did differently is not wishing them bad and just letting it ago. But to get angry at youself for getting angry is not going to do anything good to you. Just admit your emotion, think what was the reason for these anger and how you would (or want to) react to such a situation next time.

So the advice of the day is: Dare to accept your anger.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Dare to make yourself do things

I used to be of a completely different opinion about this topic - make yourself do things. I used to think that if you push yourself to do something, if it doesn't come naturally to you - then it is not yours and you shouldn't go against your own desires. But now that I have started jogging, this opinion gradually changes. I often have to make myself go out there. This is the most difficult part for me. And before I hadd started the slow running, I also had to push myself to run for another minute-two-five. So now I am coming to an understanding that pushing yourself is not unnatural. Your body may feel lazy in the beginning, but as soon as you push it out to the street and get to the job, it will adjust and be really greatful. The same applies to mental activities, not only physical. It is much easier for your mind to watch TV and just relax and not think. But in order to develop you have to make yourself read books, books that are a little bit harder for you to understand than you are used to, but that will challange you and your mind, it will make your mind start thinking. If you have to make yourself  do something, it means that you are getting out of your comfort zone. And when you get out of the comfort zone, that's when you start to develop.
So the advice of the day is: make yourself do things.

P.S. I am off for a business trip early tomorrow morning. I've packed my running shoes. Will give an update on my jogging progress after I return.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Dare to not feel guilty

Sometimes I feel that me and my Mom talk different languages. We are talking to each other, we use very calm intonations - but I just know sometimes that she doesn't agree with me, or that she is a bit disappointed because that is not exactly what she wants to hear. And after such talks (especially when it happens over the phone) I always feel guilty. Guilty that I've made my Mom upset. And here comes the question - what do you think is better - to be loud and argue when someone doesn't understand what you are trying to communicate, or to talk quetily, try to be respective of each other and not hurt each other and for those reasons not be able to say everything that's on your mind? I think that neither of them are good, but sometimes I wish I was brought up in a family where you could argue to defend your opinion. We never argued in my family. I think it is very good, but that has also influenced me - for a long time I have been afraid of expressing my real thoughts, because I didn't want to provoke an arguement. And now when I try to be more honest about my own thoughts and ideas, my Mom is still not ready to put forward her ideas. If I try to explain that I am right, she wouldn't tell me different, she would just say "OK" and I would know that she doesn't agree and that she is upset about it. But in order to keep the peace, she will not argue with me. But that's what makes me feel guilty - the feeling that I have proved my own Mother wrong. And this is what I am working on - it is not myself that she feels this or that way. I only say my opinion, how to react this opinion is her choice only and I cannot influence that. 
So the advice of the day is (it's mostly for myself): dare to not feel guilty.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Dare to share your love

Again a reference post to a lovely website - slash- movement: More Love Letters.
I have recieved once a letter from a person I don't know. Well, I do read his blog (but he posts veeeeeeeery seldom). And he has this little link on his website which says: Send me Sunshine. The idea is - you send this guy your address, and he will send you a post card from wherever he is at the moment (he is a big traveller, by the way). I recieved the postcard about 6 months after sending the address. And I was sooo happy when I got it. It was so unexpected (it was 6 months already, I had stopped waitig a while ago). And it had just the right words ("Go, don't be afriad") which are still my motto and motivate me every single day. So after I read about the More Love Letters movement, I immediatly recalled on my postcard (which is kind of a letter). And now I am thinking of making something like this here in the city. I am going to buy a bunch of post cards and write inspirational messages to make random people happy. To share my love with them. I will keep you updated on this.
So the advice of the day is: Share the love!

Friday, August 17, 2012

Dare to plant a garden

I’m Planting A Garden

I’m planting a garden.

I, who have managed to let die most every green thing that has crossed my path, am planting a garden.

I’ll admit it may be that I’m starving for the metaphor. But for now let’s just say I’m hungry for lush green, ripe goodness…and plenty of it.

I’m well aware of what it will take; or probably I am not, but will share with you now what I do know so we all are certain I gave it my best shot.

I’m no gardener as I’ve told you, but I imagine it must go something like this.

Choose good ground. Choose ground that invites you; Ground that appears empty, but you know full well it is not (nor ever has been).

Soften the soil, mix it up. Grab great gobs of earth and let it run through your fingers. Give that earth some air, so it will breathe and welcome what you wish to plant.

I was going to say plant the seed, but already I’m getting ahead of myself.

Choose it first. Choose with care. You can scatter random seeds without thought, but that’s not the garden I’m planting now.

What bounty is your whole body yearning to receive?

Choose it, and remember that sometimes it looks like what it will become and sometimes not.

Then yes, plant it! Plant the tiny seed. Dig a nice little bed to welcome it.
(Note that you won’t ever see that seed again in this potent form).

Trust enough to let the ground swallow it. Cover it up with a wish or a prayer or your fingers crossed.

Pat it with firm hands. Acknowledge the sun and welcome it.

Moisten the earth with a hose, or tears, or dance the dance of rain.

And then wait.

And listen.

And listen, and wait.

Keep it company with a song, or children playing in the sprinkler, with hammock Sundays, with few good poems.

Listen, just for kicks, for the seed cracking open. Feel for the texture of life unfolding. Catch the un-catchable moment when green bursts through silent earth.

And then can you do this?

Welcome innocence. Welcome fragility. Welcome awe.

Don’t know what to do, but do it anyway.

Guard growth like a fierce mama bear.

Avoid excessive exposure to unrelenting heat. Offer shade with the fullness of your quiet body.

Avoid deluge. Nourish with drops.

Wait and listen. Wait and listen.

Because here is where it’s easy to blow it.

Don’t get distracted with the full, fecund, farmers market basket of plenty, spilling out endless bounty, ready for consumption.

Just be curious about your babies. Curious in a way those that lift us most, ask us questions that touch the seedling of our strength and allow it to sing to the sun.

I’d say absolutely expect blossoming. Outrageous blossoming!

All in good time.

But remember the ‘all in good time’ part. Time is good. It grows things.

It grows us.

It does not run out, but it runs with us, whispering - Now.



Have you heard time’s song? He’s singing to you now. He’s not counting hours! He’s singing to you!

And even when the seedlings sprout, life insisting on life stretches to a fullness in which most who see it say, ‘Well, look at you! So glorious! So bright! So full! How did you do it? How are you doing it? Just keep it up, up, up!’.

Don’t go there.

Run with time freely and joyously, and breathe in these moments of strength. But don’t draw any conclusions, don’t get distracted. Don’t assume that now is the time to push for the prize.

Now is the time to sit with the growing beauty. To sit still, not knowing. To sit still not knowing.

Water and listen. Water and listen.

And do the work, the practice of yanking the cut-throat weeds that grow swiftly and without care.

Because you care. You care deeply. But show this in the daily hours of living, not in every 
moment’s fret. Feed what needs to be fed, walk in sunlight. Notice the breath that moves in and the breath that is released.

And then, and now…wake up one morning, dear one, and run out of doors.

There, on this day when you expect it least, you will find yourself standing in a garden of your own allowing. Your work, your love, your daily necessities, all woven inseparably into every thriving thing.

And your blossom, dear love - Full. Lavish. Distinct.

This is a poem by Heidi Rose Robbins, it is a poem and a life manifesto. I just really love it and think it's very inspiring.
So the advice of the day is: plant a garden (of good thoughts, good deeds, love and every thing else that is important to you. Remember to choose the seed carefully).

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Dare to learn

I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.  
~Pablo Picasso

I am so thankful for my job and for the people that I work with. They give me so many opportunityies to learn, to try something new. I am learning how to not be afraid of calling people I don't know and have never met. It's not that I was afraid to do that, but now I feel confident when talking to them. I learn how to tell people that they may have made a mistake, how to tell them that my opinion counts, that I can come up with something valuable.
I have discovered for myself that it is such an important thing to learn something new. To feel your brains working. To physically feel how every cell in your head starts to move. It makes you feel so alive. And to feel that you have to challange yourself to learning something that seems extremely difficult for you, or that you thought you will never understand. I have this student of mine (I give English lessons to a couple of people) and after each lesson he says that he can actually feel his brain. That's because he is thinking a lot before saying each sentence, or using this or that verb form. In our daily life and work we get so accostumed to doing things a certain way that sooner or latet so stop thinking. That's what had happened to me at my previous job, and for the last year that I was working there I could feel that I wasn't evolving, I was stuck and was living a routine life. But in order for your life to evolve, you need to evolve too. That's why it is so important  to do new things, to visit new places, to try new foods, to learn new things - everything new, unknown makes the cells in our brain go faster. And that's when you can feel that you are alive. 

So the advice of the day is: dare to learn! 

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Dare to see bad news as good news

Today has been a busy day - first a very busy meeting at work, then a nice long dinner with colleagues and then when I come home my roommate tells me that I should look for a different place to live, because the owner of the apartment will need to take up my room. At first , and actually still am a bit upset with this - and have the thoughts like "why is this happening to me". But as I think more about it, this is what I think I was thinking about inside. I am not satisfied with my roommates, they are too messy for me, they do not clean up, the floor is always dirty, the kitchen is always a mess. So I believe that I have provoked this situation. I was telling myself to try to be Ok with the girls, that I shouldn't care about it too much because I don't cook at home, I don't spent too much time out in the common areas. I usually come home in the evening, and just have 2-3 hours before I go to sleep, so I am basically just sleeping in this apartment. But still, I want to have a home where I can be 100% satisfied with my surroundings. So as my sister also move to Moscow last week with her husband, and they will soon start apartment hunting - I am thinking if I should join them? Will it be a good idea? Or should we have seperate households? They are a family and maybe I would disturb them? But they anyway were thinking to share an apartment with someone else - maybe we could move in not as relatives, but as neighbours. But it will be way more convenient when for example our Mom comes to visit. There is a lot to consider beforemaking the decision, but as I write it down I am looking at this problem (that I have to move out) with e new positive perspective. I didn't like something in my current situation and I get the opportunity to change it. Isn't it wonderful?
So the advice of the day is: see bad news as good news. Because in the long run that's how it usually is.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Dare report, part 1

Two weeks ago, on August 1st, I dared myself to go jogging 5 times a week, starting from August 6th. So I've decided to make a little follow-up. Last week has been very successful, super successful. There was absolutely no trouble for me to get up at 6:20 and go out for a run. And last Thursday I read an article about slow running, how you don't need to run so fast that your heart beats like crazy and it's hard for you to breathe. You should choose the pace that is comfortable for you. Sometimes your running may even be slower than walking. But that doesn't matter. Set a timer for 30 minutes and just run. Run as slow as you can and want. But keep running. This is a short summary of the article I read. My mind was like "What? Are you crazy? If you run slower than you walk, than why should you run at all? Just go out for a walk!" But I still decided to try it on Friday and ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT! I couldn't stop running, and I really enjoyed it.
After that came the weekend and I took a break. Because I have to admit that I feel shy to run when there are many people in the streets, that's why I've chosen 6 am, when there are only a few people. But on weekends I don't get up that early and by the time I get up there are already many people out there. So that is the reason why I only run on weekdays, and try to do it in the mornings. Yesterday morning was also very easy for me. I ran for half an hour - for the first time since August 6th, I stated with 12 minutes and by last Friday it was 20 minutes. But now with this slow running concept, half an hour seemed very doable. But today it started raining from very early in the morning. I got up, looked out of the window and went back to bed. I felt very upset with myself later, but. you know, sometimes you do need a rest, so I try to stay positive about it. There are still 5 days left of this week, and to keep up to my promise I need 4 more runs. So I can do it. I can even run at my Moms when I go to visit her for the weekend.
And here is another public promise I want to make - I will take my running shoes with me on the business trip (next week, August 21-22, and will go for a run in the morning). I feel so scared now when I write this that I may want to skip this promise. But as it is one of my principles - once you give a promise, you should keep it - I do believe in myself, and I trust myself to follow my principles.

So the advice of the day is: dare to give publice promises!

Monday, August 13, 2012

Dare to love your name

Today on Facebook I ran across a link to this little excercise - chant your name. I thought it would baffle me. I thought I didn't like my name. Well, I have actually always liked it but I thought there might be some inside believes or some ideas about the name or something like that. But no. I pronounced my name with such love and with the biggest smile on my face. Wait, a little part of this is not true. I kind of have 2 names - a short one and a long one. My family always called me Angela and that's the name I grew up with. There was a period in my life when I was a little shy of my name, I thought it was a little harsh because of the Russian [zh] sound. And my full name is Angelika. I started to call myself Angelika only about 3-4 years ago. Before that I thought that it was too fancy for me. But there was one guy who always called me Angelika. And soon I began to associate myself with this name. And I remeber when I decided that I am no longer an Angela, I am an Angelika - it was November 2008. I was starting a new job, and as I was driving there I realised that I wanted to introduce myself as Angelika, I wanted other people to know by this name. And I really-really love this name. I know it belongs to me and it reflects who I am.
There's an interesting story around this name - my Mom always loved the name Angela and she wanted to give this name to her baby. When my sister was born, everyone around was against of calling her Angela, because they said it would be difficult for other children to pronounce it. My Mom didn't listen to them, but my Dad did. So he went to the registration office and named my sister Tanya. Now when I was born, my Mom decided to register me herself, she went to the registration office, but the girl at the desk said that there was no such name in the "Book of Names", there was only Angelika. And that was what she wrote down in the Birth Certificate. My Mom was crying, and she still keeps calling me Angela. I don't mind. But for me - I am Angelika.
So the advice of the day is: Love your name!

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Dare to give up your principles

Do you have principles in life? Morals and rules that guide you? I do, for example one of them is not to lie and tell the truth no matter how bitter it is.
I think it is a wonderful thing to have the right principles - for example don't betray your friends - that is a lovely principle, isn't it?
But sometimes some people have just these stupid principles, or wouldn't do something just out of principle - and that is when it drives me crazy. For example ny sister moved to Moscow yesterday. She asked to stay at a friend's apartment (let's call this friend B.) until she and her husband found a job and another place to live in. And at the same time a different couple - also firends of B. - moved to Moscow the same weekend. And they are staying at the same place. B. herself lives with her boyfriend, so her apartment is currently empty and it was perfect that the 2 couples would stay there for a while until they got accomodated. But the only problem is that B. gave them only 1 key for 4 people, and said that she didn't want them to make any copies of the key. And for her that was a matter of principle, as she put it. What is this principle, I wonder? Have maximum 2 coipes of keys - is that one of the principles of her life? I do understand that all people are different with different backgorunds and ideas in their heads. But I just don't get it - what is the use of this principle? Does it make her life better? Does it help her make better decisions? I think that's what principles are for. And that's my advice of the day: have a close look at your principles and rules of life. If you notice some that are not making your life better, than dare to give them up. Free yourself from them.

Friday, August 10, 2012

Dare to notice imperfections

Today was the end of my probation period at my most wonderful job. I am now an official member of my beloved company. And today during the final talk with my manager one of the discussed topics was one regarding any problems I faced in the company and what I would like to improve. If I was my old self, I would most likely have said that I was completely satisfied with everything, that it was all good. Usually I'd do that to please people, to make them happy with me. And also I used to be vry shy (I still am sometimes), and I just didn't like to say my opinions out loud, so after a while I just stopped generating any opinions because I seldomly let anyone now about them. But in this company I am learning that I need to voice my opinions, that it matters. And also now that I am tying to figure out myself and my own opinion of everything, I decided not to skip these topics. So I asked myself these questions several times, and I did come up with answers. And now as a result I will go to a couple of trainings to learn new skills (one of them is something I have wanted to learn how to do for a long time).
I just wanted to say, that it is wonderful to see good sides of all things, to be positive. But in order to get better you need to notice the bad thing. Otherwise how are you going to improve them?
So the advice of the day is: Dare to notice imperfections.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Dare to not be afraid

As I told you yesterday there are going to be some major changes in the department where I am working now. I was feeling quite depressed for the last two days and mainly because of the uncertainty. If our department stops to exist than my postion is no longer required. And that scared my a lot today. I have talked a bit about it with my manager, I hope we will discuss it more tomorrow. But now I was thinking about this situation, and I have decided to not be afraid to say what I want to get out of this situation.  One of the things that I really like about my manager and another girl who I've become very close with - is that they know exactly what they want and they are not afraid to say it. Me, I have always been super considerate of other people, their feelings and emotions and thoughts about me. But you know what, if I don't say my true opinion, if you don't express your thoughts - then the whole world will just be full of lies. And I don't want that. I want to be truthful, and this time I don't want just to sit and see what they will suggest. I will ask for what I think I deserve. And I really want to stay in this company, because it has everything I have been looking for. So I will not be afraid to express my desire and will suggest the options that I find suitable.
If you are like me and always think about how to be polite with people so that they like you more - that's not how it works. They will like most when you are open with them and you say truth to them. So the advice of the day is: Dare to not be afraid!

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Dare to cry (in front of your manager)

That's what I did today. Well, actually she started it. My most wonderful manager said to us today that she has accepted a job offer in a different country. It was hard for her to say that to our small department, we are only 5 people. And our architect and me only started to work in this company less than 3 months ago. But we managed to become a wonderful team and I have been going to work with such joy every day. And I think that it was mostly because of the atmosphere we have in our department. And this atmosphere is mainly created by our manager. And now she will no longer be in this company. Which is very very upsetting. For all of us. I mean, we all cried today (we are all girls in the department, so that's ok:)) and I still keep crying. I even had a piece of the feeling-sad-chocolate cake. But you know, I have always believed that everything happens for the best. So I am sure that this will give my manager and each of us in our department a lot of new opportunities. And as Dr. Seuss says: "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened". So I am just very-very thankful that I got to work with such a great person. I surely learned a lot from her and I am happy for her for the new opportunities. And again greatful to the Universe for bringing such wonderful people into my life.

And the advice of the day is: Be greatful even when you feel upset. (And yes, it doesn't match the title today:)

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Dare to approve of yourself

I was talking to my Mom yesterday and I realized that I am still longing for her approval, for her love. I know she loves me and always has. But as a child I had this belief that my Mom loved my sister much more than she loved me. My sister was always doing everything better, she was more accurate and more thrifty and she liked to sew and I didn't and a lot of other small things which I now know that they are stupid, but when I was a little girl they were so important to me.What provoked this need for approval yesterday? I was telling something about myself, how I thought that my childhood games (I loved to play school) subconsciously influenced my choice of the University (I am a teacher by education) and still continue having this influence (I give private lesons of English). And her reply was - "well, you were not the only one who played school in childhod. I also did it, and became an accountant, not a teacher". And what I heard in those words was: "Well, don't think that you are that unique. You are just like every one else. Don't think too much of yourself".
So sometimes I still feel like a little girl who tries to show that she is special. she needs and deserves to be appriciated just for who she is and not be compared with everyone else. She wants to be loved for who she is. And I have to admit that sometimes I make choices only because I think it is what Mom would want, or because I know that this decision of mine would make her feel proud of me. And I don't actually know how to deal with this problem, with this feeling. I was trying to fight it, meaning that I would just block these thoughts whenever they came up - but that's not actaully helping me to make this feeling go away.  And I am also not comfortable talking about this with my Mom, because I don't blame her, that's just who she is and how she was taught and brought up. I can say to her please don't say this or that to me, but than wouldn't it mean that I am trying to suppress her true self? So probably the way out of this situation is to change my attitude to her words, to actually just hear only her words without trying to interprate them in my own way. That's what I will work on.
And the advice of the day is: Yours is the only Approval you need.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Dare to create

Since I have decided to go for a new daily routine starting this Monday, the last 2 days I have been trying to come home quite early in the evening, so that I could have some me time, surf the Internet a bit and just do what I feel like doing. And again the last 2 days I felt the urge to draw. I would just sit on the wide open window and draw whetever comes into my mind. (And also I want to notice here that I used to be afraid of height, but about a year ago I decided to fight this fear and I think I am starting to see the results. You see, I live on the 8th floor, it is pretty high, but I can still just easily sit on the very edge of the window and I feel absolutely calm. That's on more reason to celebrate myself today). Yesterday it were just some shapes and eyes and mouths - I have this addiction to drawing faces and sometimes even only the eyes, or one eye. And today I wanted to have a completed painting so I started to draw what I love the most - the sunset. And here's what I got:

What do you think?:) I know it is not perfect, but I do love it. I just wanted to say how nice it is make things with your own hands, to see the actual results of your life. To create your own stuff, not just try to copy someone else's. So the advice of the day is: 

P.S. A little update on my routine: I did get up at 6:20 today and went for a jog! Yay for me. That's the 1st reason to celebrate myselfv today. I love me and I am so thankful to myself! 

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Take a break

Today I slept till 10 in the morning. I usually don't sleep that late in, becasue I have this wierd thing with my body - 7-8 hours of sleep is more than enough for me and if I oversleep even for 1 hour, I will get a headache. Sometimes a cup of coffee will make the headache go away, but sometimes it won't and I have to take a medicine. I am not a fan of that, so that's why I try to avoid sleeping that much. But today I just wanted to take a break form everything - even from controlling the length of my sleep. I let myself stay in bed as much as I wanted to, I let myself eat and do whatever I wanted to. I tried to listen to my body and at some point I felt the need to close my laptop, turn off the music and just be in silence for a while. In total silence. It would have been great if I could stop thinking thoughts - but that is a skill I still need to master. I think I have read it Robin Sharma's "Monk who sold his Ferrari", where he described how these monks can go for a day without speaking and thinking, they just let there mind relax and revive. And I think that it is a wonderful practice. I am not sure if I could d it for 24 hours, but for 1 hour during a weekend - why not to try? And I will also take a little break from computer tonight - I will turn it off an hour earlier than usual. I will either go to sleep (I have a big day tomorrow, remember? - I need to go for a jog in the morning). And if I find it hard to fall asleep, I will catch up on my reading.
So the advice of the day is: 

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Read children's books

About a month ago I ran across this quote of Dr. Seuss: "Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you". I saved it on my desktop and totally forgot about it untill today, when I was doing a little clean-up. And I remebered all the other Dr. Seuss' books and poems and how I used to read them to 'my' three little boys, of whom I took care when I was in LA. There is so much wisdom and kindness and belief in the wonderfulness of this world! And here are a few more of his wonderful words:
  • Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
  • I meant what I said and I said what I meant.
  • The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.
  • Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one.
  • You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.
  • Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
  • From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.
  • Just tell yourself, Duckie, you're really quite lucky! 
  • I like nonsense; it wakes up the brain cells.
  • And the turtles, of course... All the turtles are free -- As turtles and, maybe, all creatures should be.
  • You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself, any direction you choose.
  • Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So... get on your way.
  • So you see! There's no end to the thing you might know, depending how far beyond Zebra you go.
  • Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try.
  • Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not. 
  • You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you will be the guy who'll decide where you'll go. Oh the places you'll go.
So the advice of the day is: Be a child, read children's books. 

Friday, August 3, 2012

Be you

I came across these words today on tumblr, I couldn't find who they originally belong to, but I want to quote them here, because I think it's beautifully said and I want everyone to read them:

"Hey you. Yes, you. Stop being unhappy with yourself. You are perfect. Stop wishing you looked like someone else or wishing people loved you as much as they love someone else. Stop trying to get attention from those who hurt you. Stop hating your body, your face, your personality, your quirks. Love them. Without those things you wouldn't be you. And why would you want to be someone else? Be confident with who you are. Smile. It'll draw people in. If anyone hates on you because you are hapy with yourself then you stick your middle finger in the air and say: "Screw it! My happiness will not depend on others anymore. I am happy because I love who I am. I love my flaws. I love my imperfections. They make me me. And 'me' is pretty amazing!"

I am going to write this down in my notebook and have this with me all the time. So that can I read it whenever I feel down. I love me. My me is amazing!

And the advice of the day is: Be you!

Thursday, August 2, 2012

August: month of dare

At first I didn't want to somehow distinguish this month, but ... Since I still cannot get up in the morning and go for a run I decided to follow the advice of Leo Babauta and make a public promise. So I promise you and myself that starting from August 6th I will go for a run 5 times a week. I decided to start from Monday, because I already know myself, it is easier for me this way, because I mentally prepare myself for that every day so by Monday my mind should be ready to do that. I have noticed that it is hard for me to start doing things right away - I need some time for my mind to get comforatble with an idea and to prepare itself for it. So I have decided to take a few days off, to relax and just get used to this idea - because remember how I couldn't sleep till 4 in the morning the first time I decided to do that. My mind was constantly thinking "You have to get up soon! You have to get up soon! You have to get up soon!" and then it's no wonder that it was so tired by the beginning of the morning that it didn't even hear the alarm. Well, it starts to seem that I am trying to find excuses instead of just an explanation, so I am going to stop now and get back to this topic on Monday.
Is there something you can dare yourself to do this month? If yes, then you are welcome to join me in my challange:)
And the advice of the day is again:

Wednesday, August 1, 2012


What kind of friend are you? Are you the one who has to talk to his/her friends every day? Or you can go without calling each other for several weeks? I myself am the second type. I have changed my relocation 3 times - and sometimes I have temporarily lost connection with some people I used to be close with. And this is quite typical of me. I am not a person who can talk hours on end, that's why I am not a fan of telephone calls. I usually give a call only when something major has happened. I don't know how to make small talk, I don't know how to talk about nothing. But if I don't call, or if we don't talk for a while, sometimes for a long while, that doesn't mean that I have stopped thinking of these people as my friends. I know that if my friend needs my help, I wll do all I can to provide this help for him/her. And I hope that my friends know it too.
So the advice of the day is: Be friend.