Friday, September 21, 2012

Create your support group

We are all human beings and it means that we are not supposed to function alone. Yes, there are momonets in our lives when we need to be on our own and we should take time to stay alone with our thoughts, but that is only a small part of the day. All the other time we are among other people, and these people are very-very different. It is very important who you communicate with on a daily basis. There is an old proverb that says "Who keeps company with wolves, will learn how to howl". It is very true but has a negative meaning, that is why I prefer this modern 'rule of 5' which basically has the same meaning as the proverb: "You are the average of the five people you spent the most time with" (Jim Rohn). And I would say that it does not necessarily mean 'to spend time in person', you could read books or follow in social media the people who inspire you. That is what I have learned with my own experience. Last year I was feeling depressed for quite a long time and I was looking for support among my friends. When I was trying to communicate my feelings to one of the oldest friends she only said: "oh, that must be the PMS". Other friends were there for me and I am very grateful for that, but I am not sure that they understood exactly what I was going through.
That was when I began to read books by Deepak Chopra, Brian Tracey, Robin Sharma, Louise Hay and others and their examples inspried me to become a better person, they made me believe that I deserve and can have much more that I had at that time. I am very thankful to my cousine, Marsiya, who intorduced me to Deepak Chopra, his was the first self-improvement book I read. After reading them it was so much easier for me to take that step and quit my job and move alone to a different city. But when I was here alone, I realised that I needed a support group. I needed someone to share my thoughts with. In St. Petersburg I had two friends who new a bit of what I was going through. I didn't feel that I can share a lot because I was afraid of what they would think about me. I am still very accurate about who I share my thougnts with. And I should admit that even my sister and Mom do not know about the existance of this blog. But the main reason for me to start writing here is because I wanted to share all my thoughts, to find people who are going through the same period in their lives. I began to write the blog in May, in July I have decided to make daily posts and all these time I haven't been looking for any readers, it was enough for me to just pu the thoughts out there and to hope that someone might read them. I have told only one of my friends about this blog but  now I feel that I want more readers, I want more comments,  I want to have discussions, I want to create a support group. "The goal of a support group is to create a warm non-judgmental atmosphere where members can talk about life’s challenges without embarrassment as well as give support and encouragement to each other". That is exactly what I want. I want to encourage and to be encouraged. I want to give and be given advice. I want to ask and to be asked questions which help you and me to get deeper into our feelings. I want support.
As you know I am writing this post a bit in advance (today is Sunday, September 16 and the post will be published on September, 21). I am on vacation and I don't have a laptop here, because I have decided to take some time off computers and cell phones. But when I come back I will begin to search for supporters and for those who need the support.
So the advice of the day is: create your support group!

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